I am not perfect

…. nor will I ever be.

I did it again.  This week I found myself answering questions as if I was an “ideal” grad student. And trying to live up to that ideal.  There seems to be so much pressure to be the “ideal scientist” – the one who works long hours and is constantly thinking about science.  I can do that – but when I do, my life loses balance.  I become, self-absorbed, manic, and arrogant.  My relationships with my husband and my friends suffer.

I have to remember that there is another race I am running.  I am not ultimately running a race to be the best scientist possible.  I can choose that race – but I don’t want to.  I want to run this race:

The Race of Faith

“Therefore we also, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily ensnares us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.”
– Hebrews 12:1-2
 
I need a constant reminder that my life is not about me.  I want to run the race of the Cross, bearing my little cross as Christ beared His big one. God will take care of the rest.
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